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Proverbs 31

Mother’s Day
Proverbs 31

Have you ever been in a church and wanted to applaud, but you weren’t sure if it was okay to clap? I grew up in a church like that. We weren’t supposed to applaud but you could say amen as a substitute. The thinking behind that is that we aren’t supposed to applaud the person, we aren’t supposed to give glory to the person. Instead, we are to applaud only God. The Bible teaches that there are no other gods than the one true God; God is jealous for glory to be given to him. But, does that mean we cannot praise a person with words; can we praise a person with applause; can we praise a person with gifts? Many people consider Mother’s Day a Hallmark holiday; that is a holiday created by the company Hallmark to sell expensive cards. While we agree that mothers are wonderful and often time exceptional women, is this a sham of a holiday and should we praise mothers?

The 5th commandment is “Honor your father and mother…” Exodus 20:12 From the very beginning God told us to honor our mothers. King Solomon later wrote the book of Proverbs. When it came to mothers, here is God’s absolute truth: “Her children respect and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise…The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-GOD. Give her everything she deserves! Festoon her life with praises!” Proverbs 31 God is abundantly clear on the matter – respect your mother; praise her with words; in fact we are to festoon or decorate her life with continual praises. It is God’s command to praise our mothers; this is no Hallmark holiday, instead it is the command of God to honor and praise our mothers with words. So, happy Mother’s Day; will you join me in praising our mothers by saying happy Mother’s Day…happy Mother’s Day. Not only are we to praise and bless our mothers, but husbands are commanded to join in praising their wife who is the mother to their children. Gentlemen it is time to obey God and praise our wives who mother our children. Gentlemen, today praise her with words; and please no longer wait for 1 day a year instead praise her regularly; thank her; appreciate her; bless her and praise her with words.

Solomon wrote that there are women deserving of special praise; in verse 30 he wrote, “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.” The praise for our mothers and for our wives is connected to their fear of the Lord. Is this a call to praise moms who are afraid of God? How do we fear God in such a way that causes children and husbands to praise you?

To understand the difference between being afraid of God and having fear of the Lord, we must go back to the time God audibly announced the 10 commandments. In Exodus 20, here is what we find: “When the people saw the thunder and lightning and heard the trumpet and saw the mountain in smoke, they trembled with fear.” This makes sense to me – hearing the audible voice of God showered in thunder and lightning and smoke would arouse fear. Their fear was expressed in verse 19 “They stayed at a distance and said to Moses, "Speak to us yourself and we will listen. But do not have God speak to us or we will die." They were terrible shaken and afraid for God had audibly spoken to them, so they pleaded with Moses to allow them to distance themselves from the place of God and that only Moses would speak with God rather than them. We find the distinction between being afraid of God and having the fear of the Lord in Moses’ response to them in verse 20, “Moses said to the people, "Do not be afraid. God has come to test you, so that the fear of God will be with you to keep you from sinning." Moses said don’t be afraid; instead have the fear of God with you. A mother to be praised is one who is not afraid of God but possesses the fear of God. God’s is testing his people and the only way they pass the test is if they are not afraid and you have the fear of God. What? Is that clear as mud? The fear that Moses was telling them to get rid of was the fear of coming close to God and hearing his voice. So, come close to God and do not be afraid to hear what God has to say. God was making changes; God was laying down the law, but do not be afraid to draw close the law giver. On the other hand, to pass the test the people to have the fear of the Lord which is the reality that God is fearfully powerful and opposed to sin. The fear of God’s powerful wrath against sin ought not to drive us away from God but to God for mercy. If you are running from God because you are afraid of him, then you are not yet as afraid as you ought to be. In fact, your running from God is a mockery of God as you presume you could outrun God. If you really fear God then you will stop running and turn around to run toward him. The fear is not in the closeness of God but in the distance from God; do not be afraid to come closer but have the fear of the Lord that running from God invokes powerful wrath against sin. The mother to be praised and admired is the one who more afraid of being far from God than close to God. The closer a mother draws to her God the greater her deserved praise.

Psalm 25:14 “The friendship of the Lord is for those who fear him…”
Psalm 147:11 “The Lord takes pleasure in those who fear him…”

A woman who fears the Lord will not run away from God to satisfy her longings and relieve her anxieties. She will wait for the Lord. She will hope in her God. She will stay close to the heart of God and trust in his promises. When you are hurting and lonely and desperate either you will be afraid of God and run toward some sinful satisfaction or you will draw close to God remaining in the pain and trusting God will give your strength and solutions. Ladies – what kind of women are you? Will you run to God or away from God? Will you live in the midst of the difficult trusting God or will you run from God as you find your own way? Do we have any ladies here who would say – I will run to God…ladies let’s say it – I will run to God; one more time – I will run to God. Children and guys – do you see why God says to praise the mother who fear the Lord; a mother who says I will run to God is a woman to be praised.

Praise your mother and praise your wife who desires to run to God, but not only praise her but also help her. How can we help our moms and wives run to God rather than away from God? We can create margin for them to develop their personal relationship with Jesus. One thing we all agree on is that life’s demands are busy. We are a busy people because we are a demanding people. As kids and husbands, we ask our moms and wives to do a lot. In fact, we often create home situations that encourage our moms to be Martha-s. Maybe you recall the story about two sisters – Mary and Martha from Luke 10. Jesus had come to their home to spend time with them. Martha was cooking, cleaning, hosting so much she was too busy to sit down with Jesus. Mary on the other hand walked away from the cooking, cleaning and hosting so she could spend time with Jesus. Martha complained to Jesus that Mary was not helping her, yet Jesus said "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." Do you as a child or a husband ask so much of your mom/wife that you are asking her to be more of a Martha or a Mary? Is cooking and cleaning so important to you that she does not have time to spend with Jesus? Would you rather your mom/wife not spend time with God so they can finish your task list. You want to know how to honor and praise you wife and mom? Modify your demands, change your priorities so that you prioritize her time with God. Do whatever it takes to help out or change your requests and create an environment that your mom and wife will have time and encouragement to just be with Jesus. Ask yourself this – what do I do to increase the burden and work load on my mom/wife? Do you work too much? Are you so preoccupied with your life that she is left doing everything? What we need to learn is that relationships happen in the margin of life. The margin is our down time, our non-busy time. The more free time, the more margin. Relationships happen best in the margin. When you are busy and stressed out how do your relationships fair…not so good. Same with our spiritual relationships, the more margin and free time we create the more spiritual relationship our moms/wife can have with God. Beginning this Mother’s Day give your mom/wife margin – give her time – and allow her to be a Mary rather than demand her to be a Martha.

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